Breaking the Cycle: Healing Anxiety for Ourselves and Our Children

For as long as I can remember, anxiety has been woven into my life. Looking back, I can see that it was a response to my environment - a combination of family circumstances that left me feeling like I had to be on high alert, always scanning for potential threats, always preparing for the worst. I didn’t know that what I was experiencing had a name. I just thought this was how life was: tightness in my chest and belly, racing thoughts, a constant feeling of unease and fear that would keep me up at night.

I wish someone had taught me when I was little how to work with my breath and my body. How to regulate my nervous system. How to find safety within myself when the world feels overwhelming. I can only imagine how much unnecessary suffering that could have spared me - how much confusion, self-doubt, and even physical illness I could have prevented. Because anxiety wasn’t just something that affected my mind. Over time, it took root in my body, contributing to a chronic autoimmune disease that I still live with today.

When Anxiety Took Over

Though anxiety had always been present, it spiked in my twenties. I was living in the heart of downtown San Francisco, juggling three jobs while studying at university, caught in an unhealthy relationship, far away from my family and any real sense of support. My tiny apartment in an overcrowded building felt more suffocating than safe, and the constant noise and pressure of the city only amplified the stress I was carrying. My nervous system was in a constant state of fight-or-flight, and I had no idea how to find relief.

Luckily, it was during that time that I discovered yoga. At first, it was just an escape-a quiet space where I could breathe, where I could move in a way that felt good, where I could forget, even for an hour, about everything weighing me down. But over time, it became so much more. I got certified, deepened my practice, and began what would become the journey of a lifetime, not just learning how to move my body, but how to listen to it. Not just controlling my breath, but understanding how it could transform my inner world.

The Science Behind Yoga, Breathwork, and Anxiety

Yoga and breathwork aren’t just things that feel good; they are proven, physiological tools that regulate the nervous system. Research shows that yoga decreases cortisol (the stress hormone) and increases GABA (a neurotransmitter that promotes relaxation). A study published in The Journal of Clinical Psychology found that individuals who practiced yoga regularly experienced significantly reduced anxiety levels compared to those who did not engage in yoga (Vancampfort et al., 2018). Another study in Frontiers in Psychiatry found that slow, controlled breathing exercises, such as diaphragmatic breathing and alternate nostril breathing, directly impact the autonomic nervous system by reducing sympathetic activity (fight-or-flight response) and increasing parasympathetic activity (rest-and-digest state) (Zaccaro et al., 2018).

It feels like I am not just healing my own struggles.

I am breaking the patterns that have been carried

through generations.

The deeper I go with my practice, the more I’m able to process past traumas and events that once felt impossible to face. I can manage my reactions in the present moment instead of being swept away by old patterns. I can catch anxious thoughts about the future before they spiral into overwhelm. Most importantly, I can help myself. And that is incredibly empowering. With every breath, every conscious choice, every moment of self-awareness, I am rewriting the story not just for myself, but for my children.

Motherhood and Anxiety

By the time I became a mother, I already had a practice I could rely on. Pregnancy and postpartum brought their challenges, but I knew how to breathe through them. I knew how to come back to my body, how to process what I was feeling instead of letting it consume me.

But I also know that for so many mothers, anxiety takes over completely. The responsibility, the sleep deprivation, the overwhelming love mixed with fear - it can be all-consuming. And it can profoundly shape the way we experience those first months and years with our children.

This is why having a regular practice - whether it’s five minutes of breathwork in the morning, a few gentle stretches before bed, or a full yoga session can be life-changing. It’s not about eliminating anxiety; it’s about creating space within yourself so that anxiety doesn’t consume you. It’s about learning to sit with discomfort without spiraling into panic. It’s about giving yourself the same care and presence that you so easily give to your children.

A Breathing Practice You Can Do Right Now

I want you to experience this shift for yourself. Take a moment to try this simple yet powerful breathwork practice.

Extended Exhale Breathing

Find a comfortable seat or lie down. Close your eyes if that feels safe for you.
Inhale deeply through your nose for a count of 4. Feel your belly expand gently.
Hold for just a moment at the top.
Exhale slowly through your nose or mouth for a count of 6 or 8, letting your body soften with the release.
Repeat this for a few rounds, allowing each exhale to become longer and more effortless.

As you breathe, imagine that with every inhale, you are drawing in calm, steady energy, filling yourself with light and warmth. And with every exhale, you are releasing tension, stress, and anything that no longer serves you. Picture it flowing out of your body like waves receding from the shore, leaving behind stillness and clarity.

Let this be a moment of deep rest, a moment where you are held, where you don’t have to do anything except breathe.

This type of breath signals to your nervous system that you are safe. It brings immediate calm, slows the heart rate, and shifts your energy from a state of tension to relaxation (Jerath et al., 2015).

The Power of Passing This On to Our Children

One of the most incredible things about committing to a practice like this is that it doesn’t just change us - it changes what we pass down to our children. Instead of going years without knowing what’s happening inside their bodies, feeling overwhelmed by pain and confusion, they can learn how to help themselves when big feelings arise. They can grow up with tools that we didn’t have, with an understanding that they are not their anxiety. They have the power to regulate their emotions and return to a place of calm.

If anxiety is something you struggle with, I want you to know that you don’t have to stay stuck in it. Any of my courses will help you build a practice that supports your nervous system, but if you’re a mother, my new six-week program for mothers is designed to give you a solid foundation. It will guide you in creating a practice that you can return to every day, a practice that not only helps you but also one that you can share with your children.

Because we all deserve to feel safe in our own bodies.

And it starts with just one breath.

With love & support,

Barbora

References

Jerath, R., Edry, J. W., Barnes, V. A., & Jerath, V. (2015). Physiology of long pranayamic breathing: Neural respiratory elements may provide a mechanism that explains how slow deep breathing shifts the autonomic nervous system. Medical Hypotheses, 85(5), 486-496. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.mehy.2015.07.004
Vancampfort, D., Firth, J., Schuch, F. B., Rosenbaum, S., Mugisha, J., Hallgren, M., & Stubbs, B. (2018). Physical activity and yoga practice in people with anxiety disorders: A systematic review and meta-analysis. The Journal of Clinical Psychology, 74(5), 743-756. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.22548
Zaccaro, A., Piarulli, A., Laurino, M., Garbella, E., Menicucci, D., Neri, B., & Gemignani, A. (2018). How breath-control can change your life: A systematic review on psychophysiological correlates of slow breathing. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 9, 35. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2018.00035